Do I have a personality disorder?

In the past, whenever I have tried to form close relationships with people, there comes a point where I feel like I get "too close" to them and then I have to emotionally "back away" so that that won't ever happen again. Now I have an opposition toward getting too involved in other people's lives as a friend because perhaps someday we might grow apart and I'll just feel stupid and ashamed for even being so intimate with someone who might eventually be a stranger to me. I have a list of reasonable qualities I'd like to find in the ideal partner, but I fail to find any of these qualities in myself. I constantly feel like I'd make a horrible husband/lover because of my cold, standoffish nature. What can I do about this? Oh, one more thing, I am also obssessed with personal privacy.